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An Open Window

portrait

hahaaaa. back again! my cpap machine is kind of a wonder to me. i actually catch myself missing the feeling of it on my face in the mornings, much like when i would cover my face with the blanket to keep my nose warm. (the nose mask does that for me now...)

i've been getting very restful sleep. my dreams aren't nearly as tumultuous or, at the very least, erratic, or chaotic. they're different dreams than i usually get - or at least they feel significantly different, to me. they're... slower? if that makes sense. maybe because im in REM sleep for much longer periods of time...

my leg's doing better, now, i think. still occasional weeping, but it's a lot less so. i don't change bandages nearly as frequently. i'm seeing wound care soon (a few days), so maybe they can give me more tips, or something more permanent to solve the swelling (which has thankfully gone down significantly since starting treatment).

i was scared of talking to my endo the other day, so my friend willo sat in with me, which i am honestly so unendingly grateful for. generally i do all my appointments solo. i said that to some friends and they were really surprised. i am in my late 20s, though, and i've been going to solo appointments since i was like 19. so i think it's normal for me.

but i got sidetracked. sorry. anyway! willo sat with me and helped steer the conversation a bit when the doctor became fixated on weight loss and things. i am not going into detail (i think ive said what i wanted to about it already!), but it ended up better than i hoped. i haven't been that anxious or scared about an appointment in a looooong time. since before i was on HRT, i think.

i finally got my new tablet cord, also, which has been a bit of a long story for me. i needed to replace my old one because it kept flickering and wouldnt keep the screen on for long (i figure it's just worn out after a year or two of use!). i got the wrong one shipped initially (the labeling didnt tell me...??), but the huion customer service was helpful and i got the right type this time. i'm really eager to get back to painting things.

in the meantime i've been doing a lot of pixel art in aseprite. it's a good program. i think probably the best program i've used for pixel art, TBH. it's really user friendly and feels comfortable to use. i even used it to make some sprites for a game jam game w/ friends that came out pretty good. i need to figure out how i want to do a pixel gallery sometime (something that isnt too code-intensive and doesnt require a lot of pages or images to show off!).

miss penny's been a little ill lately, but some diet changes (and brushing) seem to be helping. (it IS going into summer, after all... even if she's a shorthaired cat, she still sheds fur!)

the only thing i could ask for right now is a better chair... i'm using a rocking chair in lieu of a proper desk chair because my old one was super-hardcore leaning to one side and just awful on my butt and back. this one i can at least put cushioning onto to keep my spine from compressing. but i'd still like something that swivels!!!!!

i think that's the long and short of recent developments. allergies kicking my ass. etc. but everything seems to be OK for right now.

looking out my window for the neighbor's cat,

forest's signature

playing: dwarf fortress
feeling: weary
outside it is: sunny sunny